The Middle Ground Is Undervalued

Moderate approaches to life don't make the headlines.  It's the extremes that make the news many times.  Even bases and acids have to produce the right mix to allow for pure water.  A centered lifestyle allows for a good mix of rationale and emotion, mixed in with a good dose of spirituality and a healthy appreciation for the mystery of life.  People like John McCain had enemies on both sides of the political aisles.  Jesus did as well as he talked with religious people from all walks of life.  I am a centrist and a happy one.  It's a good place.  I don't like to sell my soul to those who need or demand absolute allegiance, other than to God.  The middle lets me hear various opinions on new housing versus maintaining lively green spaces.  The middle ground helps me to own my humanness while keeping in touch spiritually and rationally.  I am a middle child, well sort of, as I have an older sister, and older fraternal twin brother and a younger sister.  I assume that would make me a card-carrying middle child.  Jesus said, "blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God."  I realize that life will demand fierce competition and strong stances on occasion.  Yet, more times than not, the middle is the better place, even with a little wiggle room to the right and to the left as necessary.  It's a good thing that the sun rises and it sets.  I don't think constant 90 degree sun would work well, although 10 hours of it in the summertime sounds like a great day to me.  So, I continue to seek middle ground, peace, and harmony as I am able.   One day all creation will be brought home to God and all Creation will find the ultimate middle ground where the wolf and lamb will lie down and the adder and young child will play side by side.  Sign me up.

The Rhythm of Believing and Doing

In the Gospel of of John, chapter six, the disciples ask Jesus what work they must do and Jesus says the simple word, "believe." He told them to believe and that would be the work. It's a mixture of some ideas and it's simple yet profound. The work is to believe. Really, that simple, really?

Yet, once the work is done, it becomes a matter of living life. It's pretty routine sometimes. Believe and then go forward, boldly into life. Enjoy your breakfast. Talk to family and friends on the phone. Pray. Contemplate. Slow down. Enjoy the day off. Open your heart to someone you may not really like very much. Take the trash to the county dump. Get up and go to work. Do your job. Trust that the best is yet to come. It seems to me that once "believing" has occurred, then the assurance of God's presence and help in the world is a matter of God's commitment to people. Yes, God is there and God helps and God leads. But, the choosing and doing is all a matter of choice.

So, the veil between the deep spiritual connection with God and the joy of living life is a truly thin one. There is unity between believing God and brushing one's teeth. They are connected. There is no separation. God is present in the believing and God is present when I took my trash to the dump this morning.

I guess the key is this: Believe. That's where everything starts but its all connected. One life. One body. God with me. God with you.

Tweaking Golf's Short Game: Intuition and Practice

Last weekend I had the joy of going to the golf range, with my son, and getting some much needed practice.  It was fun to see him make consistent, long straight drives between 230 and 250 yards.  My drives were a bit shorter but both of us are somewhat consistent drivers.  It’s fun to stay with one’s best club (the driver) and enjoy the regular payoff of a good drive.  It feels good to hit the ball well, but the truth be known, it’s one’s weakness that really adds strokes to the final score.  For me that’s my short game from 50 yards out to the green and flag.  There is no doubt I add more strokes to my score around and on the greens. 

At the range I made a concerted effort to hit numerous balls with my pitching wedge.  It’s one of the most important clubs in the bag:  driver, pitching wedge, and putter probably the top three.   I was pleasantly surprised at the positive shot results as I “intuitively tweaked” my pitching wedge backswing and club speed.  It took some really bad shots to help me realize where and how to make some needed tweaks.  Practice pays dividends.  Intuition helps with deciding what changes to make.  My golf short game needs a lot of work.   New insights and results happened when I made a change or two.  In this case, I shortened my pitching wedge back swing and it gave me more control of the ball speed and direction.  It felt good to see visible results. 

Intution is a gift that all humans can tap.  It’s that inner knowledge that leads one in a better direction when facing challenge or change.  Intuition is something that can be gently held as it ever so subtly leads one forward with new goals and vision.  Practice doesn’t hurt either.  Playing is one sure way to improve.  Practice does make perfect as the saying goes.   Lowering my stroke numbers from 50 yards out will make golf more fun for me.  Tweaking my game is on me.   Intuition and practice should be two of the best friends of the weekend golfer.  

Opportunities and Growth

Fear is good—sometimes.   I continually face new challenges at work and in life.  I have learned to engage the challenge and to move boldly forward into the experience.  Perfection is never the goal.  The greatest MLB baseball batting average is around .360 (Ty Cobb).  That’s a hit once every three at bats.  The goal is to do one’s best with the gifts and knowledge that one has to bring to a challenge.   Making a difference by showing true care, lovingkindness, and even courage will usually be enough.  Perfection may come or it may not happen. The goal is to step up to the plate and do one’s best.    The only thing to fear is fear itself as one wise person said many years ago.   Good luck and blessings to you and to me as life gives us great opportunities to live, to love, to challenge, and to show courage in the midst of adversity.  Amen.   

Parenting 101: Giving Freedom to Discover Self

Looking for a relevant topic for my blog I have come back to "parenting."  As a father of four grown adults it has become continuing clear to me that kids need lots of freedom to explore their talents.  They need ways to try out new options:  some may want to play sports, some want to play a musical instrument, and others want to become computer geeks.  All of these options become ways for kids to discover who they are as God created beings.   Kids need freedom and assurance to discover their passions in life and what they can do and be as a contributing member of society. 

Parenting is a marathon and and not a 100 yard dash.  So, it's not uncommon for kids to weave right and then left and then make a 180 turn.  It's part of growing up.  Here is my best wisdom.  Talk with them about what they like, what they want to explore, what they find rewarding and then work to set up opportunities for them to become a more fully developed and integrated young person and eventual adult.  Maybe most important, resist the opportunity to create "mini-me's" and let them become themselves.  This approach will empower them with the freedom to explore life and to own their choices and eventually become fully responsible for themselves.  It's a good way to help kids to become autonomous and accountable and it's a win-win for kids and parents and even larger society.  This approach can be helpful for kids to be happy and well-adjusted as they discover their true selves. 

The Miracle of Language

English and intermediate Spanish, with some basic Koine Greek and basic Hebrew: that's the extent of my language knowledge. More importantly, language is the way to understand another person and without coherent communication, the world is bland and people are just names. With language I get to hear the story of another. WIthout language, maybe taken by disease or by stroke or an unfortunate accident, a person faces possible alienation and loneliness that is hard to overcome. 

I recently stopped in my tracks and contemplated the miracle of words and the importance of hearing another person's story as they were forced to overcome an acute event that was impeding their ability to communicate. I marveled, once at again at God's work and human evolution in the power of human connection via the spoken word. Sometimes the meaning of communication is not the exact words but the message between the words. The whole is greater than sum of the parts. Just listen: the cooing of the morning dove, Lucy gently barking in a sweet upward pitch saying hello to a bystander, the radio show host with the perfect voice, Crosby/Stills/Nash/Young harmonies on their epic album Deja' Vu, hearing the spoken words of grown children and eagerly waiting to hear how the granddaughter's voice will sound as she ages, and the list goes on. Finally, and most mysteriously, hearing the voice of God and the Spirit, via scripture, personal encounter, and the experiences of others. Today I am grateful for the miracle of "language" as its value never loses its currency in my world.

Let's Have a Conversation

I am convinced that one of the most undervalued available relationship tools is deep, thoughtful and engaging conversation with another person.   The topic can be anything like politics, religion, sports, weather, philosophy, fishing, golf, parenting, cars, computers, so forth and so on.  I hope that I can discuss just about anything within reason with another person who is committed to maintaining mutual respect around ideas, culture, and values. 

Today I had the blessing of having a lengthy discussion around some deep political issues that have surfaced in our country and the conversation was with a person with whom I have a fair amount of difference of opinion in some cases.  In other cases there was some real common ground with the person.  Either way working at a back and forth, civil and thoughtful conversation around important topics is an easy way to increase quality of life.  I find that I become a better person as I understand another’s views while also trying to articulate my own ideas in a clear way that the other appreciates. 

Conversation takes time.  It takes grace.  It takes a commitment to understand another person.  It is giving dignity and respect.  It makes my world richer.  Hopefully it enriches the life of the other person too.  For me, deep conversation offers so much to gain in the areas of ideas, spirituality, and relationships with others.