Tweaking Golf's Short Game: Intuition and Practice

Last weekend I had the joy of going to the golf range, with my son, and getting some much needed practice.  It was fun to see him make consistent, long straight drives between 230 and 250 yards.  My drives were a bit shorter but both of us are somewhat consistent drivers.  It’s fun to stay with one’s best club (the driver) and enjoy the regular payoff of a good drive.  It feels good to hit the ball well, but the truth be known, it’s one’s weakness that really adds strokes to the final score.  For me that’s my short game from 50 yards out to the green and flag.  There is no doubt I add more strokes to my score around and on the greens. 

At the range I made a concerted effort to hit numerous balls with my pitching wedge.  It’s one of the most important clubs in the bag:  driver, pitching wedge, and putter probably the top three.   I was pleasantly surprised at the positive shot results as I “intuitively tweaked” my pitching wedge backswing and club speed.  It took some really bad shots to help me realize where and how to make some needed tweaks.  Practice pays dividends.  Intuition helps with deciding what changes to make.  My golf short game needs a lot of work.   New insights and results happened when I made a change or two.  In this case, I shortened my pitching wedge back swing and it gave me more control of the ball speed and direction.  It felt good to see visible results. 

Intution is a gift that all humans can tap.  It’s that inner knowledge that leads one in a better direction when facing challenge or change.  Intuition is something that can be gently held as it ever so subtly leads one forward with new goals and vision.  Practice doesn’t hurt either.  Playing is one sure way to improve.  Practice does make perfect as the saying goes.   Lowering my stroke numbers from 50 yards out will make golf more fun for me.  Tweaking my game is on me.   Intuition and practice should be two of the best friends of the weekend golfer.  

Opportunities and Growth

Fear is good—sometimes.   I continually face new challenges at work and in life.  I have learned to engage the challenge and to move boldly forward into the experience.  Perfection is never the goal.  The greatest MLB baseball batting average is around .360 (Ty Cobb).  That’s a hit once every three at bats.  The goal is to do one’s best with the gifts and knowledge that one has to bring to a challenge.   Making a difference by showing true care, lovingkindness, and even courage will usually be enough.  Perfection may come or it may not happen. The goal is to step up to the plate and do one’s best.    The only thing to fear is fear itself as one wise person said many years ago.   Good luck and blessings to you and to me as life gives us great opportunities to live, to love, to challenge, and to show courage in the midst of adversity.  Amen.   

Parenting 101: Giving Freedom to Discover Self

Looking for a relevant topic for my blog I have come back to "parenting."  As a father of four grown adults it has become continuing clear to me that kids need lots of freedom to explore their talents.  They need ways to try out new options:  some may want to play sports, some want to play a musical instrument, and others want to become computer geeks.  All of these options become ways for kids to discover who they are as God created beings.   Kids need freedom and assurance to discover their passions in life and what they can do and be as a contributing member of society. 

Parenting is a marathon and and not a 100 yard dash.  So, it's not uncommon for kids to weave right and then left and then make a 180 turn.  It's part of growing up.  Here is my best wisdom.  Talk with them about what they like, what they want to explore, what they find rewarding and then work to set up opportunities for them to become a more fully developed and integrated young person and eventual adult.  Maybe most important, resist the opportunity to create "mini-me's" and let them become themselves.  This approach will empower them with the freedom to explore life and to own their choices and eventually become fully responsible for themselves.  It's a good way to help kids to become autonomous and accountable and it's a win-win for kids and parents and even larger society.  This approach can be helpful for kids to be happy and well-adjusted as they discover their true selves. 

The Miracle of Language

English and intermediate Spanish, with some basic Koine Greek and basic Hebrew: that's the extent of my language knowledge. More importantly, language is the way to understand another person and without coherent communication, the world is bland and people are just names. With language I get to hear the story of another. WIthout language, maybe taken by disease or by stroke or an unfortunate accident, a person faces possible alienation and loneliness that is hard to overcome. 

I recently stopped in my tracks and contemplated the miracle of words and the importance of hearing another person's story as they were forced to overcome an acute event that was impeding their ability to communicate. I marveled, once at again at God's work and human evolution in the power of human connection via the spoken word. Sometimes the meaning of communication is not the exact words but the message between the words. The whole is greater than sum of the parts. Just listen: the cooing of the morning dove, Lucy gently barking in a sweet upward pitch saying hello to a bystander, the radio show host with the perfect voice, Crosby/Stills/Nash/Young harmonies on their epic album Deja' Vu, hearing the spoken words of grown children and eagerly waiting to hear how the granddaughter's voice will sound as she ages, and the list goes on. Finally, and most mysteriously, hearing the voice of God and the Spirit, via scripture, personal encounter, and the experiences of others. Today I am grateful for the miracle of "language" as its value never loses its currency in my world.

Let's Have a Conversation

I am convinced that one of the most undervalued available relationship tools is deep, thoughtful and engaging conversation with another person.   The topic can be anything like politics, religion, sports, weather, philosophy, fishing, golf, parenting, cars, computers, so forth and so on.  I hope that I can discuss just about anything within reason with another person who is committed to maintaining mutual respect around ideas, culture, and values. 

Today I had the blessing of having a lengthy discussion around some deep political issues that have surfaced in our country and the conversation was with a person with whom I have a fair amount of difference of opinion in some cases.  In other cases there was some real common ground with the person.  Either way working at a back and forth, civil and thoughtful conversation around important topics is an easy way to increase quality of life.  I find that I become a better person as I understand another’s views while also trying to articulate my own ideas in a clear way that the other appreciates. 

Conversation takes time.  It takes grace.  It takes a commitment to understand another person.  It is giving dignity and respect.  It makes my world richer.  Hopefully it enriches the life of the other person too.  For me, deep conversation offers so much to gain in the areas of ideas, spirituality, and relationships with others.   

The Summer Day by Mary Oliver

The Summer Day

Who made the world?

Who made the swan, and the black bear?

Who made the grasshopper?

This grasshopper, I mean-

the one who has flung herself out of the grass,

the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,

who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-

who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.

Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.

Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don't know exactly what a prayer is.

I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down

into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,

how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,

which is what I have been doing all day.

Tell me, what else should I have done?

Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

—Mary Oliver

Friendship

About three weeks ago my church’s senior pastor presented a sermon on friendship.  One of his statements from the sermon is still staying with me.  He said, “Sometimes we treat friendships like a paper plate at a picnic…tossed away when it is no longer needed.” It was a strong statement but one that spoke to me.   He challenged the church in attendance to avoid treating friends as disposable commodities.    His words were even more challenging as he discussed the in vogue topic of “loneliness” and it’s pervasiveness in many people’s lives in the midst of our high-tech world.

Since that sermon I have been contemplating my own approach to friendship.  I have only so much time and energy to share and that is true for most people.  We can’t befriend the world but becoming a better friend is a high and holy goal for many, including me.    

So, first, I want to be God’s friend. That’s where I start.  If nothing else, there is a commitment from God that is unchanging and not humanly fickle.  Yes, God and me.  That’s a win-win and I need that more than anything.

Second, my pets have always been my unconditional friend.  Lucy, our black 12 year old Pug is faithful to the core.  She loves me and loves people and loves my family.  What more can a dog owner ask? 

Third, I want to be a better friend and I can only hope to receive the same care from others.  Friendship takes time, money, caring, and patience to name a few underlying parts of the friendship, give and take, equation.  Most of the time the friendship is in a fluid state and subject to life’s challenges that each friendship experiences.   There is an ebb and flow of the caring, giving, and receiving. 

To conclude I am thankful for my friends.  I want to be a faithful, good friend to others as I am able.   It’s a lifelong pursuit but it is certainly not easy.  Blessings to you and to me as we work on being a friend and having friends.